Did you hear that bell? Well, you know what that means!!! It’s time for another Wedding Redux, where we ask couples whose weddings we photographed to talk candidly (and helpfully) about things they loved and things they would change. It’s in the form of a Q&A, complete with friendly advice and feedback. Today’s couple – Elizabeth & Kyle Bishop – are faves of ours. We shot their engagement and bridal photos and then their amazing March wedding. Pay attention brides and grooms – their input is thoughtful and detailed!
YOU’RE MARRIED. You’ve done it! Now… IF you could plan and execute your wedding day all over again, what would you do more of?
Kyle: “Dancing. I wish we had been able to invite more people that would have danced with us. I think it would have made the reception more festive.”
Elizabeth: “Eating! Even though we tried to make sure ahead of time that we would get something to eat, we still only managed a few bites of the appetizers. We chose such yummy food for our guests and then didn’t get to enjoy any of it.” [PIXELS NOTE: Look for Kyle’s funny addition at the end of this blog about food. And sadly, we see this all the time. Great intentions to eat the food and then it never happens.]
What would you do less of?
Kyle: “Prep work. Hiring a wedding planner would have helped with that.”
Elizabeth: “A wedding planner definitely would have been nice to have, especially with all the other things we had going on while we were planning our wedding.”
This came up a couple of other times during the Q&A with these two. The wedding planner vs. friends and family debate. The Bishops told us how they wish they’d hired a planner to take the stress off of themselves and their many family and friends who stepped in and stepped up to help from the planning all the way through the day. It’s a tough call, when you have a budget, and Ryan and I certainly don’t get a kick-back if a couple decides to hire a planner. We just want happy couples. We’ve seen weddings planned with family and friends that were flawless and relatively stress-free but you never know. The key word is stress. So figure out ways to eliminate as much of it as possible.
What do you wish you’d done, but were afraid to do?
Kyle: “Learn a couples dance to break into for our first dance. That would have been pretty neat.”
Elizabeth: “A choreographed couples dance would have been a lot of fun, but neither of us is very confident in our dancing skills. Our friends and family probably would have loved it though!”
Positive and negative feedback (or advice) on any or all of the following:
Attire?
Elizabeth: “LET YOUR DRESS SHOPPING BE FUN! Going into shopping, I think a lot of brides stress about finding “the one” but we shouldn’t. The right dress at the right price IS out there and you will find it. It may not be at the first or second shop and that’s okay. It also might be at the first shop and that’s okay too. My gown was the third one I tried on and I insisted on trying several others because I thought “‘It can’t be this easy.'”
Food?
Kyle: “We liked the choice of food but the delivery was lackluster. Many people had to wait longer that we would have liked to eat.
Elizabeth: “Food was… a bit of an issue for us. Everything was delicious, but there seemed to be a lot of confusion between what we expected, what we were told we would have, and what we ended up with. Most of our guests didn’t realize there was any issue, but it was a source of stress for us leading up to the event and on the day of. Be sure that you know exactly what you’re getting, how it will be served, and what the kitchen’s plan for timing is.”
Flowers?
Elizabeth: “We were lucky enough to have my sister and maid-of-honor offer to make all of our flowers from various craft paper and book pages. It was a lot of work for her, but it was the prefect addition to our day and not having to worry about picking up flowers on the actual day was a big load off our minds. We did have a live flower bouquet to toss though. I was not about to throw one of my sister’s creations.”
Location?
Kyle: “We had our dream wedding. Boone was the best place for that.”
Elizabeth: “Where do you want to get married? Go there! We knew that no matter where we had our wedding, most of our family was going to have to travel several hours, so we chose somewhere WE wanted to get married. If you do have a wedding away from home, I would suggest providing your guests with a list of favorite restaurants and local activities. Many of our guests arrived the day before and spent time shopping or sight-seeing before our ceremony started.”
Elements of the ceremony?
Kyle: “The chapel was the right place. Again, somewhere special that we always wanted to get married.”
Elizabeth: “Your officiant can really make a big difference. We were lucky enough to have a family member that is also an amazing minister. Find someone that makes the two of you feel comfortable and who can speak to you as a couple.”
Number in the wedding party?
Elizabeth: “I always imagined a small wedding party, maybe three. At most four. I am, however, lucky for have a husband with a lot of friends and a desire to include them all. I admit, it stressed me out a few times along the way, trying to coordinate that many people, but in the end everything worked out well. Kyle’s guys were wonderful about helping with setup and all of my girls were perfect. My biggest piece of advice would be not to worry about tradition too much when it comes to your bridal party. I had a bridesman, who stood on my side and our grandmothers were our flower girls. Everyone loved them!”
Time of year? Time of day?
Kyle: “It was a perfect time of the year. We got snow and sun. What more could we ask for?”
Elizabeth: “I think these things are really personal to each couple. We knew we wanted a big party of a reception and that we wanted it at night, so that dictated our ceremony time. We also knew that we didn’t want our anniversary too close to either of our birthdays or any particularly important holidays. I would advise finding out when the peak wedding season is in your desired area, and then choosing a date a couple of weeks before or after that. Doing that helped us really stretch our budget.”
DJ vs. a band?
Kyle: “Our DJ was the best decision. We were able to pick out the songs that we wanted and direct the flow of the evening to our liking.
Elizabeth: “We wanted so many different kinds of music that a DJ was really the only way for us to go. Ours had a great song selection and managed everything really well. The only thing I would mention here is to make sure ahead of time that your DJ is comfortable announcing things during the reception. We assumed that was part of being a DJ and we were wrong.”
Vows?
Kyle: “Write your own and it will allow you to show how much you care about each other.”
Elizabeth: “We wrote our own and I loved it. I admit, I was nervous to read my own words in front of everyone, but it was ultimately more important to me that Kyle know exactly how I felt. My biggest advice here would be to speak up! I was so nervous and emotional that I wasn’t able to project very well and as a result, not all of our guests heard what I was saying.”
Name 3 things you would do differently, if, by some strange wrinkle in the universe, you could do it all again (to the same person of course):
1. Lock down the schedule of events for the reception so that everything is on time.
2. Hire a wedding planner to lower overall stress.
3. Have a pizza from Capone’s pizza for my grooms cake.
Name 3 things you would not change / would do the same:
1. Location and Time. I feel like our wedding was perfect.
2. Our photographers. They were the best vendor decision of the wedding. [THANKS, GUYS!]
3. The oldest couples dance got some people on the floor dancing that didn’t dance the entire night.
We love family portraits whether they are set in the studio, the great outdoors, a specific location like the mountains or high country, or on our property in our outdoor portrait garden.Pixels on Paper photographs babies and kids, engagements and weddings, brides and special events and portraits of all kinds in our Wilkesboro, NC studio. We would be honored to meet with you, learn about you and your family and be a part of taking special portraits that will become, we hope, family heirlooms.
This wedding, between Jamie Goforth and Daniel Harrison, was windy and gorgeous. The two can coexist, and if you check out their portraits from the day, you’ll see. As part of our series where we ask the bride and groom for feedback to share for future nuptials, here are some insights from Jamie.
“I wish that I had used more flowers in my ceremony and reception, but both locations had lots of natural beauty.
We were married at an outside chapel in Glade Valley, NC. It was windy and cold on the day of the wedding. My bridesmaids wore leggings under their dresses (LOL). I would tell those planning a wedding to remember to think about how the weather will be on the day of your wedding.”
Number in the wedding party and number of guests — any thoughts or changes? “We had 6 bridesmaids, 6 groomsmen, 1 flower girl and 1 ring bearer. This was a large party but I knew that I wanted and needed them all by my side the day of the wedding. We had around 150 guests and I think that was a nice number, but more than we really wanted. I personally think the smaller the better with the amount of guests.” [As a couple who’ve photographed more weddings than we care to count, we loved the honesty in that answer. It’s important to know who you want and need with you on your wedding day. It will matter later more than you can imagine. Just saying…]
Time of year? Time of day? “We had a fall wedding in the mountains, 4PM and the leaves were beautiful on the trees that time of day. It was a little chilly, as I mentioned, though.”
DJ vs. a band? “I preferred a live band, but they were much more expensive, so I went with a DJ and the reception was great… a LOT of participation on the dance floor!”
Wedding planner or “family-and-friends-all-hands-on-deck” approach to planning? “I think that having a wedding planner is better than all hands on deck. This is so there is only one person to go to for everything. That one person will know what you want in your wedding and if others want to assist they can. Just have the wedding planner approve it.”
Name 3 things you would do differently, if, by some strange wrinkle in the universe, you could do it all again (to the same person of course). “I would have had a cocktail hour while taking our pictures after the ceremony. I feel like the whole day was a blur, I would try to slow down and take it all in. I would have eaten, instead of just taking a few bites, but of course I wanted to talk with all of our guests.”Most important piece of advice: “Tailor the ceremony to who you are as a couple. Daniel and I love camp fires and s’mores so we had a fire in the fireplace at the reception with a s’mores bar for our guests.
Make the day about what you envision and not what other people want or think it should be. It was honestly the best day of my life and I got to enjoy it with all my family and friends.”
We love family portraits whether they are set in the studio, the great outdoors, a specific location like the mountains or high country, or on our property in our outdoor portrait garden.Pixels on Paper photographs babies and kids, engagements and weddings, brides and special events and portraits of all kinds in our Wilkesboro, NC studio. We would be honored to meet with you, learn about you and your family and be a part of taking special portraits that will become, we hope, family heirlooms.
This was the wedding of Meghan and Josh in August of 2015. The groom made the arbor they stood beneath (a gift to his bride) and she walked down the aisle to Bruno Mars’ “Marry You.” There were amazing details in every direction – from the mountains behind them as they pledged to be together for life, to the bouquets, color choices, and reception where everyone danced and partied late into the evening and stayed for the weekend.
BUT. What if they could do it again….? Do it all over again.
If you’re planning your wedding – listen up.
We asked Meghan and Josh what they would change and here is what they said. [insert the high-pitched rewind sound here and clip of everything moving at top speed in reverse]
Name 3 things you would do differently, if, by some strange wrinkle in the universe, you could do it all again (with the same person of course)?
I wouldn’t worry about a shuttle service to get people to and from town. I wouldn’t book vendors based solely on price and I wouldn’t try to do things I wasn’t completely happy with just to save money.
Name 3 things you would do again, if you could?
I would definitely do a small destination like we did where we all stayed in cabins together for the weekend so it was an extended celebration. I would still have my personal and humorous wedding. I would use my florist, caterer, and my photographers a million times over.
Tell us about vows. Any changes?
I LOVED our vows! We wrote our own and they were completely original and US. They were humorous, but still sweet.
How about the number of guests?
DO NOT invite everyone you have ever known and don’t worry about people getting their feelings hurt. Throughout this process, I started to notice that for every person we added to the guest list, we were adding approximately $75/head. This is where I should have cut my budget instead of scrimping on other things or trying to put too much work on myself.
Did you use a wedding planner or the “family-and-friends-all-hands-on-deck” approach to planning?
I had a planner and don’t know how we would have done it without her. I wish we had utilized her even more instead of me trying to do it myself to save money! I tried to do a lot of things on my own or use people who were “cheaper” to try to cut costs. I would have paid the extra amount and had everything taken care of and not worried about it! Do you notice a trend here?!
Time of year? Time of day?
I never wanted an August wedding, but then I never planned a wedding until I had to. August was perfect! Late summer was perfect for my colors and the time of day and location (on top of a mountain) made the weather absolutely unbelievable!
Location?
My fiancé and I wanted something that was natural and gorgeous, which is exactly what we got. We had to go way out in the county to find this, and didn’t want people to worry about driving. We wound up spending more money for a shuttle service to and from town and up and down the mountain than if we had just paid extra somewhere else. We had to rent two sets of chairs because of two separate locations, get generators, and lug things up and down the mountain just to try to get everything we needed into this “natural” space.
What about the elements of the ceremony?
Make it ALL about you! Traditional or not, putting your personal touches on these makes all the difference in the world and it is what your guests will remember.
Decorations & decor?
Make sure they fit your venue. I wanted glitz and glamour mixed with the natural space and additional vintage elements. Sometimes your venue is decoration enough!
Number in the wedding party?
I would suggest going with the smallest number of people possible. My 6 were perfect, but the smaller the better.
Positive and negative advice on any or all of the following:
Attire?
Dress in things that will look good, but also fit your location.
Food?
EAT! I said, “oh we are GOING to eat!”…then we didn’t. We loved the food we selected and then we didn’t even get our to-go boxes.
Gifts?
Don’t register for things you have no intention of using, regardless of what people think you need!
Flowers?
My flowers were one of the TOP things that made my wedding! The colors were gorgeous and tied together my color scheme perfectly! In an attempt to save money, I tried to use potted plants at the altar, but I should have let my florist do those as well.
What, if anything, do you regret?
I don’t regret anything, however, there are a few family members that I wish I would have taken pictures with before they left. I wanted the majority of the pictures done before the ceremony so that we could use the full time for the reception. I had some older family members I assumed were going to stay through part of the reception, but they left right after the ceremony, so they aren’t in any of my photos.
What do you wish you’d done, but were afraid to do?
There are a few moments of my wedding that I wish had been slightly more serious, but that is just not my personality. I was scared to have anything even slightly sentimental because I knew I would cry, so I did everything in my power to make sure that I didn’t break down.
What would you do more of?
If I could do it over, I think I would have enjoyed things more. I don’t say that to mean I didn’t enjoy it, but it was a very stressful time, and I went through different phases and a boat load of emotions. I had days where everything mattered and I didn’t care about the cost; other days, I wasn’t spending a dime, and nothing was a big deal because it was just a “celebration.” Looking back, I see that these were things I will only get to do one time and I would have cherished every moment even more if I had truly had a concept of this.
Stay tuned for more in this series — Wedding Redux, especially if you’re a bride-to-be, maid of honor, mother-of-the-bride or newly engaged. Hearing from those who’ve stood where you are about to stand can make all the difference in the world.
We love family portraits whether they are set in the studio, the great outdoors, a specific location like the mountains or high country, or on our property in our outdoor portrait garden.Pixels on Paper photographs babies and kids, engagements and weddings, brides and special events and portraits of all kinds in our Wilkesboro, NC studio. We would be honored to meet with you, learn about you and your family and be a part of taking special portraits that will become, we hope, family heirlooms.
On February 2nd, 1709, British sailor Alexander Selkirk was rescued after being marooned on a desert island for 5 years. His story inspired a book most of us read as kids … or at least we know it: it’s the story of Robinson Crusoe. Real quick – young sailor, impetuous, adventurous, defied his parents and sails to Brazil and Africa and eventually is marooned on an island and completely alone. He survives, becomes skilled, grows closer to God, picks up a slave named Friday and is finally rescued. Good book, you readers out there.
What does this have to do with Flynn Alexander Lundy? Precisely nothing, except that Flynn was born on February 2nd just over 300 years later. And he’s a boy. And with a name like Flynn, he’s got adventure in him – we just feel it. Kathren & Nathan Lundy (Flynn’s mom and dad) are a couple we photographed for their engagement and beautiful wedding portraits. Prior to the session at our Wilkesboro studio, we asked that they send us photos of their home so we could coordinate backdrops for little Flynn. And there was the sea – in foam, in depths of green and blue and a little sailor to place among them. Their home was filled with color and matches their lively and fun personalities. We loved matching our backgrounds to their palette.
We look forward to photographing Flynn and his parents for many years to come. For now, he’s resting up and dreaming of voyages far way.
We love family portraits whether they are set in the studio, the great outdoors, a specific location like the mountains or high country, or on our property in our outdoor portrait garden.Pixels on Paper photographs babies and kids, engagements and weddings, brides and special events and portraits of all kinds in our Wilkesboro, NC studio. We would be honored to meet with you, learn about you and your family and be a part of taking special portraits that will become, we hope, family heirlooms.